rainwaterspark (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
rainwaterspark) wrote2021-11-18 01:45 pm
rainwaterspark) wrote2021-11-18 01:45 pm
Entry tags:
Writing goals/rambles
I'm bumping my wordcount estimate for Novel #4 up to 45-50k words. I have a lot of investigation left to write, so this is definitely going to be more than 40k. If I can get up to 50k, I think I'll feel relatively "safe" for the first draft wordcount (with the goal of reaching 60k during revision).
My goals for finishing the first draft are as follows: End of December will be a "soft deadline" for me, end of January will be my "hard deadline." I'm not pushing myself super hard to finish by the end of December because I also want something to work on when my Novel #3 goes back on submission in the new year (even though I technically have another novel idea waiting in the wings).
While I do think I generally slow down after the 30k word mark, I think the rate-limiting factor right now for this particular book is nailing down the sequence of events that's necessary for the murder mystery investigation, so in theory, once I have that settled, it shouldn't take too long to finish the draft. In theory.
I sometimes feel like I'm still pushing myself hard when it comes to writing because I don't have a traditional book deal yet. I know every published writer says "the goalposts are always moving, so don't overwork yourself," but I keep feeling like I'd be much more relaxed once I have a book deal. At least I can stop feeling like I still haven't proved myself to my parents yet/have sacrificed a social life and dating life for nothing. I've been in such a grind mindset that it's so hard for me to even convince myself to take this upcoming Saturday off from writing, because I need to run certain errands to try to address the constant anxiety that has made my life difficult for over a month now—and I have to keep reminding myself that "it's okay, I'm taking most of next week off from work so I'll have time for writing then."
And at this point in my author career, even if my Novel #3 does get a book deal, I almost feel like I'm not even expecting much from it anymore in terms of sales. It's been such a hard, uphill battle to get (white) gatekeepers interested in this book that if I didn't have an agent, I would have given up so long ago, because I'm so tired and I've nearly internalized the idea that nobody wants this book. I've also experienced, multiple times now with my indie-published books, the crushing hurt that comes from reviewers who tear the soft, tender heart of your book apart, including representation of your own lived experiences, so if Novel #3 gets published I fully expect someone to write that my book Actually has "incorrect" representation of Chinese Americans/autism/whatever.
Honestly, if at least one Asian diaspora reader likes Novel #3 and I get an okay advance and marketing push, that's all I want, really. Meanwhile, I have new fantasy projects to work on.
My goals for finishing the first draft are as follows: End of December will be a "soft deadline" for me, end of January will be my "hard deadline." I'm not pushing myself super hard to finish by the end of December because I also want something to work on when my Novel #3 goes back on submission in the new year (even though I technically have another novel idea waiting in the wings).
While I do think I generally slow down after the 30k word mark, I think the rate-limiting factor right now for this particular book is nailing down the sequence of events that's necessary for the murder mystery investigation, so in theory, once I have that settled, it shouldn't take too long to finish the draft. In theory.
I sometimes feel like I'm still pushing myself hard when it comes to writing because I don't have a traditional book deal yet. I know every published writer says "the goalposts are always moving, so don't overwork yourself," but I keep feeling like I'd be much more relaxed once I have a book deal. At least I can stop feeling like I still haven't proved myself to my parents yet/have sacrificed a social life and dating life for nothing. I've been in such a grind mindset that it's so hard for me to even convince myself to take this upcoming Saturday off from writing, because I need to run certain errands to try to address the constant anxiety that has made my life difficult for over a month now—and I have to keep reminding myself that "it's okay, I'm taking most of next week off from work so I'll have time for writing then."
And at this point in my author career, even if my Novel #3 does get a book deal, I almost feel like I'm not even expecting much from it anymore in terms of sales. It's been such a hard, uphill battle to get (white) gatekeepers interested in this book that if I didn't have an agent, I would have given up so long ago, because I'm so tired and I've nearly internalized the idea that nobody wants this book. I've also experienced, multiple times now with my indie-published books, the crushing hurt that comes from reviewers who tear the soft, tender heart of your book apart, including representation of your own lived experiences, so if Novel #3 gets published I fully expect someone to write that my book Actually has "incorrect" representation of Chinese Americans/autism/whatever.
Honestly, if at least one Asian diaspora reader likes Novel #3 and I get an okay advance and marketing push, that's all I want, really. Meanwhile, I have new fantasy projects to work on.