Dec. 31st, 2014

rainwaterspark: Image of Link at the Earth Temple in Skyward Sword (legend of zelda skyward sword earth temp)
None of the factions (besides Amity and possibly Erudite) seem to be that psychologically healthy for people, but Abnegation probably takes the cake.

Selflessness is, in theory, a good virtue to have. The problem is that it's rare and it's basically impossible to be selfless on a regular basis, because human beings are just not built for that to be possible. It's not a bad thing, necessarily, to pay attention to your own needs and take care of yourself. Selfishness is really only terrible if you end up hurting other people in the process, not because there's something inherently sinful about having personal needs and wants.

It's possible to be nice to other people, but being nice to people because it's the decent thing to do does not equal selflessness. For example, it's perfectly possible to be nice to other people and have some ulterior motive. You might be nice to someone because you want something from them, or you might be nice to someone because you get a feeling of gratification from doing so. Which, it seems, would kick you out of the zone of selflessness.

Perhaps more seriously, being raised never to think about yourself can have serious psychological consequences.

I didn't think about this too much while I was reading the book—I vaguely got what the author was trying to convey and kind of just rolled with it, but something about Abnegation struck me as unpleasant. Now that I really think about it, it is severely unpleasant. Like I mentioned, human beings aren't built to never think about themselves. One possible consequence of being raised this way is you might end up unconsciously developing a backlash to that kind of thinking and end up constantly craving recognition, while simultaneously feeling like you're not "supposed" to think this way, and ending up with a metric ton of self-loathing. Or you might end up actually becoming a very selfish person because you're constantly denied the opportunity to think about yourself. Or you could end up with screwed-up and possessive attitudes about love, because you wind up craving from others what you're unable to give to yourself (self-love).

That's the worst part of being raised this way: when you're taught not to value yourself as an individual, you become unable to value yourself. But everyone has a basic instinct to want to like themself and want others to like them, because no one wants to be hated (by themself or by others), and so you end up with constant mental stress and irreconcilable tension. You become unable to think of yourself in positive terms, and even if you were transplanted to an environment in which people sang your praises every day, you'd desperately cling to it, but at the same time you wouldn't know what to do with it and you'd feel like you don't deserve it. Speaking from personal experience, having zero self-esteem really, really sucks when it comes to emotional healthiness. I mean "you could end up with colossal intrapersonal and even interpersonal issues, not to mention depression" levels of suck. It's not something to be desired at all.

[Tangent: I wrote about something similar to this, a person being unable to value themself as an individual. I accomplished that through a combination of memory loss and psychological conditioning. Needless to say, said character had massive psychological problems. It was difficult to write and, based on some people's reactions, rather distressing to read.]

And that's not even getting into the most extreme form of selflessness, when it becomes self-destruction. Which is kind of what happened to Tris in Insurgent, and if the author wanted to point out the flaws in the factions, that was a good place to get up on a soapbox and talk about how Abnegation is kind of warped. But unfortunately the book wasn't self-aware enough to go there.

Taking pride in your accomplishments is a good thing. Being able to recognize your strengths is a good thing (I think there's some kind of saying that false modesty is a form of lying, or something like that). A little bit of selfishness isn't bad. Being able to pay attention to and take care of your own needs is a good thing, because the alternative is an unpleasant and unhappy way to live.



...That was a little less coherent than I intended. Oh well.

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